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Oct 14, 2004
Driving

So I'm back here in Ithaca. Yay, Ithaca. The process of getting back here was a bit more interesting than usual. You see, I drove all the way from Connecticut to Ithaca by myself, the longest trip I've driven by a longshot. In any case, I learned a few important lessons, which I will soon impart to you, dear readers. But first, let me issue this cautionary message: If you are now, or ever intend to be my father or mother, please do not read further. That's right. Just click somewhere else. Or go find a shiny thing to play with. Everyone likes shiny things.

No, I'm serious. Please don't go on. I beg of you.

Ok, now that they're not reading (I hope), I can share my acquired wisdom:

When driving... 1. Do not attempt to keep pace with the car with whom you are merging. Neither waving at the other car nor looking guilty helps the situation. Not much, at least. 2. If you stray too far to the right, you'll hear this noise, like "krrrrrggg." That's bad. Don't do that. 3. Don't ever mix up the two pedals, as they do opposite things. This goes doubly for when you're on an onramp to a highway. 4. Note that the blind spot, unlike Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, or the Pope, is not imaginary. It is very, very real.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

you're kidding, right? please say you're kidding ...or remind me never to get in a car with you....

ilan said...

(Nervously) Yeah, I'm kidding.
Ha, ha, funny joke wasn't it?
Ha, ha, would anyone be that stupid?

Anonymous said...

I remember the first day you showed off your driver's permit in Ramaz. You were so proud. Brings tears to my eyes really, especially after reading this...

Aylana

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