Reality TV and Other Disasters

This whole reality TV thing is getting out of hand. I mean, it's gotten out of hand already, but this is worse. I mean, there are the maddeningly mad Martha Stewart-wannabes on "Wickedly Perfect" (the first reality TV show in CT....figures), the disturbing families on "Wife Swap" and "Trading Spouses," the whole digging up emotional scars and picking at 'em on "High School Reunion," and who can leave out that mucus-encrusted gem (or is that "gem-encrusted mucus?") of the Fox lineup, "Who's Your Daddy?" Please tell me that there's a special level of Hell for the producers of these shows. Like one with both "holy wrath" and "great vengeance," with some brimstone mixed in for good measure. What is brimstone, anyway? You never hear about it these post-biblical days. You don't see a newspaper with the headline SEVEN-YEAR-OLD MIRACULOUSLY SURVIVES DANGEROUS BRIMSTONE ACCIDENT "That Was Some Pretty Strong Brimstone," Authorities Say. But that would be cool, wouldn't it? The headline, not the brimstone. I imagine brimstone is very much in the "not cool" category. In any case, back to reality...TV. What's next? Who's going to be able to top that? I'll tell you. Fox is going to strike again, with a show where they just videotape real people being taken out back and getting shot. It's called "When Guns Go Off," and it's sure to be a hit. Ok, so that last one I made up, but admit it: for a split second, you believed me.